Friday, March 25, 2011

There Goes My Hero! (Reader Submitted)

     No matter where you go, you'll never escape that song. God bless the Foo Fighters. They are the most overplayed band on the planet and every time I hear them I am so glad they aren't Creed or Nickelback that I don't even mind listening to the same 4 songs over and over on every station...Was this a Foo Fighters post? We've been cranking out the jams in such rapid succession here at TroxTalk that I almost forgot where I was headed..AHHH YES! HOMEWORK!
      For this TTHA (Trox Talk Homework Assignment is the new official title) I asked you, the reader who your favorite athlete was to ever grace a field, court, pitch, rink, or alley. If anyone had actually picked a bowler, I would have given you a plaque. Everyone has that one sports figure who had a hand in shaping the person they are today. Take mine for example. 

Frank Thomas AKA The Big Hurt
         Just look at that monster. Frank was 6'5" and weighed about 270. Over 18 seasons he had a career batting average of .301, he hit 521 homers, he had about 2500 hits, and just over 1700 RBIs. In short, during the mid 90s he was an absolute freaking beast! Not to mention he had about the coolest nickname a professional athlete could have. You may as well have told me his nickname was He-Man. I was completely sold. The Big Hurt was a 5 time All-Star (incidentally those All Star games were during the same 5 seasons I played little league if I'm not mistaken. We were soulmates.) He had 4 Silver Slugger Awards, 2 AL MVPs, and he won the Home Run Derby in 1995. Frank wore the number 35 like me. He was an outfielder like me. He was a little chubby like me. And he was better at mashing the ball than he was at running the bases...like me. His arms were gigantic and his head was the size of a melon, so he was probably roided out like the rest of the goons from his era, but I didn't care. Little kids don't give a shit about juicin'. I even had the video game featuring Frank Thomas!

You can't photoshop a game this bad.
        Since Franky T was mine, I was pretty anxious to see who you would guys would come up with...Let's get to it. Please pass your papers to the front...

Submitted by Polar J. Bear. "Barry Sanders because he played for a shitty team and he made it happen anyway. He never showed off and retired on top. I mean Emmit Smith had more rushing yards, but he also had 6 coked-up Clydesdales blocking for him."
Submitted by Jesse. "Pelé is the Michael Jordan of soccer. When you're a kid and you grow up playing Soccer, he's what you aspire to be. He was quick, and he broke people's ankles left and right." If soccer was a sport, this would be a perfect submission. Sorry, I had to.

Submitted by Syphax. "It was Chris Sabo, because I wore glasses as a kid and the whole rec-specs thing, anyway it was the early 90's, I was a young fool. I met him last year as all the Red's were back in town celebrating the 20th anniversary of their World Series season...he was a dick. It was like meeting ALF only to find out he was an alcoholic who likes little boys, TOTAL let down. I had just met Eric Davis that night, HE suggested we get a picture, I was just starstruck, a 45 second encounter and I let him go on with his night, I didn't want to be THAT guy. I saw Sabo, and had to talk to him to tell him he was my childhood idol and all I got was, "I'm trying to have a good time, in private." And he walked away."
Submitted by Dustin, Trox's trusted attorney..Who apparently Trox will be needing soon if he continues to badger Rihanna.. "Craig Biggio – yeah, he isn’t too fancy and was never a flashy player, but he has the record for most hit by pitches. I got to see him as a kid at the Astrodome (yeah, with the original astro turf that was like playing on concrete) and he was always a solid player."


Submitted by D-Bag and Steve M. 2sports+2votes. Bo Knows math. These posters respectively said..."I'd have to say Bo Jackson. 2 Sports. Awesome at both of  'em." and "Bo Jackson. He was a phenom!" Bo probably would have been my close second to Frank Thomas..Do you remember catching him on Techmo Bowl? Neither does anyone else! Also, Did you catch Chris...errrr...Jim Everett in that old 'Bo Knows' spot? TV used to be better.


Submitted by Dave from The Best Podcast. "Bill Russell. 11 titles in 13 years." 'Nuff said.

Submitted by Schuster.
"To me, Barry is the modern epitome of cincinnati reds baseball. A classy player with a brilliant skill set. Entertaining to watch, and  a great leader. Plus his number was 11, which is my birthday day. That didn't hurt. Down the road, the guy even took a massive pay cut so he could stay in our city and play ball here. A great role model as a citizen and a ball player
Ironically, I became a pitcher,
but that's a different story."
 
Submitted by Phinny from The Best Podcast. "It's almost as difficult to make an argument against Steve Yzerman being the greatest hockey player of all-time as it is to pronounce his last name. Drafted by Detroit at the ripe age of 18, he was the primary catalyst in transforming the "Dead Wings" of the 80s into the perennial powerhouse that the Red Wings are today. Along the way, he managed to win 3 Stanley Cups, appear in 10 All-Star games, win an Olympic Gold medal, and have his #19 jersey honored forever in the rafters of Hockeytown. He wrote the book on hockey while everyone else was trying to bitTorrent the Cliff Notes on a 56K. As the longest-serving team captain in NHL history, Steve Yzerman is the definition of a leader and my favorite athlete of all-time."

Submitted by Chaske. "I like Kobe because he's a ruthless competitor, is a cold-blooded finisher at the end of games, has won multiple titles, and is one of the few professional athletes nowadays that actually puts the team before himself/fame/accolades and wants only to win championships. He hasn't labeled himself an 'entertainer and icon', doesn't run his mouth in the media, he's a winner." (EDITORS NOTE: When you are lethal enough to earn the moniker "The Black Mamba" and your skills make people forget about monogamy altogether, it means you're doing something right.)
 

Submitted by Cody. "I'll go with Cal Ripken Jr. His nickname was the Iron Man. He so loved the game of baseball that he didn't miss a single game for over 16 seasons." Is it safe to say that CRJ has been to more Orioles games than all the fans in Baltimore combined? I kid. 
Submitted by Tommy.
"Deion Sanders. i loved him growing upcause he was a show offand would talk shit..and prove it" Me too Tommy, I like the showboats, and Prime Time was the king.
Submitted by Derrick. MJ was the man. I've been a huge North Carolina fan all my life because I grew up there. Everyone known his is the best basketball player who ever lived." ANOTHER EDITORS NOTE:  Michael Jordan is the face of pro basketball. Also Nike, Coca Cola, Chevrolet, Gatorade, McDonalds, Ball Park Franks, Ray O Vac, Hanes, Wheaties, MCI, harbored grudges, and Space Jam... Even girls grew up wanting to be his Air-ness. I'm not sure if anyone will ever be as great at anything as his was at basketball.

           Well, that wraps up this week's TTHA! This might be the best one to date. Thanks to everyone who made the grade. Your submissions keep the TroxTalk engine from stalling. I might try to get into a little college hoops if I get time over the weekend. I'm just one man. If not, I'll check you Monday. "Yo, homes! Smell ya lata!"

                                                                     Warmest Regards,

                                                                       Trox



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